
Here in New Zealand they have introduced a before school check with your local nurse. Included in the booklet to complete is a questionnaire, one copy for the parent(s) to complete and one for your child's kindy or preschool teacher to complete. I completed mine while the other copy was at kindergarten so I wouldn't be swayed or influenced by what the teacher wrote. On receipt of their copy I was pretty shocked at a few of the observations the teacher had noted, which went against what I had noted here at home. And the one that stood out for me was that it was 'somewhat true' that Lucy was being bullied or picked on. Imagine it! I appreciated the teacher making note of it, as I'm sure it would have been far less fuss to just say that it wasn't an issue, but it kind of shocked me.
I spoke to the teacher about it at pickup today and she very tactfully elaborated that there are a few tight-knit groups and Lucy is not always successful at breaking into them. I've noticed these cliques before, and was shocked at how early they form (I am talking 3 and 4 year olds). Lucy tends to get on better with the quieter, gentler kids, and this clique I mentioned is comprised of very outgoing, flamboyant girls. I would really rather Lucy didn't care about joining them but she is very social, and loves the interaction. The teacher thought, and this is my translation of her tactful explanation, that they take advantage of her and make her do things that they could otherwise do themselves. My husband isn't reading much into this questionnaire but I am pretty riled. I mean, imagine where she's older. I know how mean some girls can be.
I was bullied a little at school. I recall one girl, when I was 13 or so, who would walk really close behind me, for very long periods of time. Like a silent shadow. It was quite intimidating, and I still remember her name, and what she looked like at the time (squat body, no-neck). Troll.
Do you have any advice on raising confidence and esteem in young children, or any good books to share? I've noted down a few to look at, and I also wonder whether a drama-type class might be beneficial also.
As Patrick Swayze said "Nobody puts baby in the corner".