A bit of a waffle here…
Heck, where do I start on this topic? I am convinced there are women out there who do everything right and have their babies sleeping 7 until 7 from the early months though frustratingly I am not one of them.
Lucy did from 10 weeks (I didn’t believe it until recently checking my scribbly breastfeeding notes from 3 years ago), though she did have top-ups of formula. These were initiated by a paediatrician in hospital and severely set back my ability to produce enough milk. Lucy’s birth was pretty stressful too and leaving the hospital severely anaemic (having turned down an offered blood transfusion) no doubt didn’t help matters at all, nor did the fact she was a weak feeder.
After tirelessly and tediously pumping day and night, at three months I managed to ditch the formula topups and return to exclusive breastfeeding. It’s infuriating how easily and casually Drs prescribe formula top-ups to unsuspecting mothers before breastfeeding is well established, knowing it is a case of supply and demand.
Audrey’s was an entirely different (much better) birth and breastfeeding came easily (apart from the mastitis and utterly annihilated nipples (sorry to those reading this who aren’t mothers…)). Milk supply was plentiful and Audrey was, and still is, a strong feeder.
In the early days, I nursed Audrey then put her to bed, at which point she was either very drowsy or asleep. You know you’re supposed to put them to bed awake but when I tried this she screamed and I soon learned that if I was to get any sleep then nursing her to slumber was what I needed to do to survive. Six months later I was still nursing her to sleep, which meant I was the only one who could put her to bed. Books like The Baby Whisperer say ‘feed then play then sleep’. But after feeding Audrey when she woke up and when she went down meant if I was to suddenly change to this recommended routine she would effectively miss out on a feed. I don’t know why I didn’t think of this other idea sooner, it’s so simple – finish her feed at least 15 minutes prior to bedtime. That was she gets that extra milk and is wide awake to self-settle. It’s only been four or five days but it’s going great. I am confident now Brendan can put her to bed without my help, which has to benefit everyone.
The book that helped me ‘fix’ this problem was Tizzie Hall’s Save our Sleep. She outlines some pretty strict routines, which to be honest I’m not really following but she did have other great advice such as what to do about early wakers, and getting regular nap times established. If you want the excerpt on early wakers, email me.
I borrowed a copy of this book from the library when I was at my wits end a month or two ago. As I searched for the book online I felt I was the only mother with a six month still not sleeping well at night until I saw all nine books were out! The copy I am due to return now has twelve people waiting for it. Haha, I am not the only one!
The funny thing is that Audrey has been an excellent day sleeper for quite some time (two sleeps of around 2.5 hrs each, plus the occasional late nap), so I didn’t want to change anything there. I kept asking myself, what is so different about the bedtime sleep versus the day naps and I now think she has a two hour limit wake-time and this includes the gap between her last nap and bedtime. Before this she might be staying up for 2.5 -3+ hours and was more difficult to settle and then slept fitfully.
A friend, whose baby slept through the night from an early age, only just mentioned that her baby sleeps only 1 hour max during the day. So I guess we may all be in the same boat after all, it’s just a trade off for either daytime peace or night time sleep.
Honestly, is there anything more complicated, yet so simplistic, than baby sleep?
Heck, where do I start on this topic? I am convinced there are women out there who do everything right and have their babies sleeping 7 until 7 from the early months though frustratingly I am not one of them.
Lucy did from 10 weeks (I didn’t believe it until recently checking my scribbly breastfeeding notes from 3 years ago), though she did have top-ups of formula. These were initiated by a paediatrician in hospital and severely set back my ability to produce enough milk. Lucy’s birth was pretty stressful too and leaving the hospital severely anaemic (having turned down an offered blood transfusion) no doubt didn’t help matters at all, nor did the fact she was a weak feeder.
After tirelessly and tediously pumping day and night, at three months I managed to ditch the formula topups and return to exclusive breastfeeding. It’s infuriating how easily and casually Drs prescribe formula top-ups to unsuspecting mothers before breastfeeding is well established, knowing it is a case of supply and demand.
Audrey’s was an entirely different (much better) birth and breastfeeding came easily (apart from the mastitis and utterly annihilated nipples (sorry to those reading this who aren’t mothers…)). Milk supply was plentiful and Audrey was, and still is, a strong feeder.
In the early days, I nursed Audrey then put her to bed, at which point she was either very drowsy or asleep. You know you’re supposed to put them to bed awake but when I tried this she screamed and I soon learned that if I was to get any sleep then nursing her to slumber was what I needed to do to survive. Six months later I was still nursing her to sleep, which meant I was the only one who could put her to bed. Books like The Baby Whisperer say ‘feed then play then sleep’. But after feeding Audrey when she woke up and when she went down meant if I was to suddenly change to this recommended routine she would effectively miss out on a feed. I don’t know why I didn’t think of this other idea sooner, it’s so simple – finish her feed at least 15 minutes prior to bedtime. That was she gets that extra milk and is wide awake to self-settle. It’s only been four or five days but it’s going great. I am confident now Brendan can put her to bed without my help, which has to benefit everyone.
The book that helped me ‘fix’ this problem was Tizzie Hall’s Save our Sleep. She outlines some pretty strict routines, which to be honest I’m not really following but she did have other great advice such as what to do about early wakers, and getting regular nap times established. If you want the excerpt on early wakers, email me.
I borrowed a copy of this book from the library when I was at my wits end a month or two ago. As I searched for the book online I felt I was the only mother with a six month still not sleeping well at night until I saw all nine books were out! The copy I am due to return now has twelve people waiting for it. Haha, I am not the only one!
The funny thing is that Audrey has been an excellent day sleeper for quite some time (two sleeps of around 2.5 hrs each, plus the occasional late nap), so I didn’t want to change anything there. I kept asking myself, what is so different about the bedtime sleep versus the day naps and I now think she has a two hour limit wake-time and this includes the gap between her last nap and bedtime. Before this she might be staying up for 2.5 -3+ hours and was more difficult to settle and then slept fitfully.
A friend, whose baby slept through the night from an early age, only just mentioned that her baby sleeps only 1 hour max during the day. So I guess we may all be in the same boat after all, it’s just a trade off for either daytime peace or night time sleep.
Honestly, is there anything more complicated, yet so simplistic, than baby sleep?
Lucy, 8 days old - notice her legs? My goodness, she was a tiny thing.
we can usually get a solid 2 hour nap in the morning about 2 hours after he wakes up (5.30-6ish). the afternoon is chaos, unfortunately. i try to nurse him to sleep after 2 hours of wakefulness, but sometimes he's too distracted for even that.
ReplyDeleteour sleep routine starts at 6pm with solids (cereal or pureed), a book or two, and then a bath with me. after that, the air purifier is turned on (white noise) and i nurse him down. i tried to stop nursing before he falls asleep (pantley method), but after a week of screaming fits, i couldn't take it anymore. clearly i'm a terrible candidate for cry-it-out.
i'm the only one who can get leon to nap. even bouncing him gently in arms only works when i'm doing it. this has made things very difficult for us. 6 months of sleepless nights and hyperactive days has me feeling ragged.
the sad thing is, leon was sleeping (more or less) in his crib until month 4. sometimes it would take 20 minutes to get him back to sleep, but we would tough it out. sometimes he would end up sleeping the final 2 hours in bed with us. but then someone suggested i nurse him in bed. guess what? leon seems to have moved into our bed permanently and will only fall asleep with boob in mouth. he also refuses to take a bottle. thank god he eats solids now, so matthew can finally help out.
i feel like things were progressing normally, and then i took a wrong turn. it's been getting worse ever since. the past 3 nights he has been waking up every hour. i don't know if it's teething, he doesn't show any other signs of gum pain. i am beyond exhausted.
i'll have to check out this 'save our sleep' book. i'm at my wits ends.
Glad you're having success with this and hope it continues! My 14 month old naps well, goes to bed easily and rarely wakes up...until 4:30 am that is. Does the book have any advice for early wakers older than 1? If so, I'd love to hear it. I let him cry a bit to see if he'll put himself back to sleep, but this usually means he'll play in his crib and then cry every 10-15 minutes until I get up. Every once in a while he sleeps through until 5:30 which I can handle, but I don't know how much longer I can take these 4:30 wakings.
ReplyDeleteThere is a wonderful book called Healthy Sleep Habits, happy Child by Dr Marc Weissbluth (isbn 009190255-X. It really helped us and is based on real research of how babies sleep.
ReplyDeleteOur baby is 2 1/2 months old and I don't expect her to sleep through for some time. While some babies do they are few and far between. Also what people call sleeping through the night can vary alot.
Good luck
I'm very blessed with my little boy. From the time hes was 6 months he slept right through the night from 6 in the evening till 7 the next morning.
ReplyDelete'After tirelessly and tediously pumping day and night, at three months I managed to ditch the formula topups and return to exclusive breastfeeding. It’s infuriating how easily and casually Drs prescribe formula top-ups to unsuspecting mothers before breastfeeding is well established, knowing it is a case of supply and demand.'
I so agree with you on this point! The same happened to me. I wish the nurses at the hospitals and clinics where educated more on breastfeeding!
Catherine,
ReplyDeleteI can completely relate. Bella was up eating every two hours until she was five months of age, and managed to cry all day as well, and only take 30 min. naps. It was maddening. What worked for her for some odd reason, was pumping the milk, and giving it to her in bottle. I regret giving up putting her to breast, but had to to save my sanity. I pumped until she was 9 months, when at that point I was on meds to keep my supply.
I think you are just wonderful trying to nurse as long as possible. It is the hardest work you will ever do, (besides raising your children) but will reap huge benefits for the rest of their lives. I applaud you, and I support all breastfeeding mothers out there...
Hope Audrey continues to snooooze for you. :)
I think your Audrey is fine. She snoozes during the day that's why she wakes up at night.
ReplyDeleteMy Poon is 7-month old yesterday. He get hungry every 1.30 hours with only 1-hour nap during the day. I just finish my blog before clicking yours writing about my daily time table. If you have time please visit, you will probably feel that having a child snoozes during the day is better than sleep through the night. Cheers !!
Carrie - Thinking about it, I'll probably get into big trouble reproducing actual articles from the book, so I'll say it in my own words:
ReplyDeleteA 7pm bedtime should be adhered to, not half an hour earlier or later. It's all to do with sleep cycles and timing. However if your child goes to bed at 7pm and still wakes up early, then trying a 6.30pm bedtime. it's easy to think that the child should go to bed later and wake later but it's actually the reverse. Sleep begets sleep! If you want more info, email me directly.
I never tend to comment on websites and always feel slightly voyeuristic looking at others lives. Anyhoo, a friend posted me a link to your blog noting 'she has a new baby, and she sews, just like you.' I am always very impressed at the lovely items you sew for your two. I have a 6 month old, (still not sleeping through) but sew every manner of Merino garments for him.
ReplyDeleteThank you for posting the lovely clothes you sew, and updating about small things like sleep that are so all encompassing when you have a new baby.
All the best. Oh, and a quick ps. Fabric nappies are horrendously expensive to buy, I have found a website 'Greenbeans' which sells the PUL fabric, and the wee snaps, that make up nappies. You could easily make up a perfect pocket nappy for around $5, just in case anyone else is looking into the modern cloth style nappy, and can sew.
Thanks again.
Melissa
M - thanks for your comment. I love looking at other blogs when I have the time, and think if they are happy to share then it can't be too voyeuristic? I treat them as sort of e-mags.
ReplyDeleteI really think everyone should learn to sew at the earliest possible opportunity - I just think it's such a great skill to have especially when one has children. And thanks for the link about Greenbeans. It made me remember a friend giving the info to me some time ago and I completely forgot about it. I must give it a try. It also has to be easier to go cloth when your baby is predictable in that department, i.e. use cloth for No. 1's. Every little bit of cloth nappy usage helps right?!
Mu - Audrey does actually sleep during the night, it's just she still wakes for feeds (once or twice). If she was up playing I would most certainly be looking at day sleeps :)
Matt and I joke that Freddie (6 months tomorrow) is like a little piggie tirelessly rooting for “truffles” at night. Whereas our 3 year old was sleeping through the night by 5 months. I don’t know that any one scenario will work in every instance, but I do think the important thing is to always remember to not get too stressed about whatever happens as parents. Our pediatrician has reminded me on more than one occasion that children always sense when you are stressed and the stress hormone even crosses over into breast milk. I definitely had to remind myself of that last month while Feddie was getting his bottom teeth in. I didn’t think the “truffles” were gonna make it ;).
ReplyDeleteAlso check out the book, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child - it's awesome. Sleep begets sleep!
ReplyDeleteA 'Dream Feed' at around 10.30 pm seems to help a lot of breastfed babies sleep through the night. Sleep is so important for everyone so good luck! + Well done for keeping up the breast feeding! I look back and think how on earth I managed to get through umpteen bouts of mastitis, etc....and triumph in the end. So very worth while.
ReplyDeleteI love reading these posts! I learn so much. Hopefully when the time comes I'll have enough brain cells firing at one time to remember it.
ReplyDeleteI would have to agree that Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child helps immensely, at least it did with all my 3. Sleep begets sleep, limiting wakefulness during the day, consistent naps, etc. are all hugely important.
ReplyDeleteMomlissa - I will get that book out then. Having had three children and used the same book is encouraging!
ReplyDeleteThe only thing stopping me getting a good night's sleep now is Audrey waking once or twice for a feed, and sometimes waking between 7pm and 10pm also. The thing is, come morning she half-heartedly feeds rather than being ravenous, obviously because she's filled up prior. I'd like her to skip the night feeds and have a really good feed on waking. Always something to work on it seems :)
Krissie - she actually wakes for a feed anyway, so it's not so much a dream feed but a conscious feed.
ReplyDeleteTera - I totally belive that about the stress. Even being in the same room as someone stressed affects you, so imagine drinking something they produced!
I hope you're hanging in there and enjoying Freddie!